iterumnetwork | [VIDEO]; UN: Sleepwalker

[Despite the fact that Sam has no fucks to give, the artistic eye will appreciate the fact that she's gone out of her way to frame the shot. She's sitting at her kitchen table--a strange Formica beige with glittering pieces of plastic stuck in it, like sparkles in a hospital corridor. She's just off center, so as to keep things interesting. Behind her is her window from the Tower, overlooking the City.

Sam looks young. She also looks a bit like she was Photoshopped; perfect skin, bright eyes, plastic hair. Well, the skin was genetically engineered, her eyes are just blue, and her hair is, in fact, plastic. Mostly, though, Sam just looks tired. Obviously, the last month has been rough on everyone. What with a sentient (?) city abducting them all. It just doesn't help that she's still not over some of the bullshit that she was in the middle of back home.

For a second, she taps her fingertips to an empty coffee mug, black and chipped nail polish flashing a little in the light. Then she clears her throat to speak, in a surprisingly mild, Midwestern accent.]

Okay, so. Here's the deal. I'm like all of you. Like you, I was kidnapped and dropped in the middle of this fu...in the middle of this city. Like you, I'm pretty done with these demons or whatever else prowling the streets. Like you, I just want to get by. Like you, I'm working on figuring out a life and job and all of...that. I'm like you.

But here's the thing. I'm not like everyone. I'm a fu...vampire. I'm a vampire. And before you start freaking the...freaking out or whatever, let me make something clear to you: While I drink blood, I don't want yours. Okay? I'm not going to jump anyone in an alley. I'm not violent, I'm not dangerous, I'm not a murderer.

[She presses her lips together for a moment in a hard line. Obviously, this is very important to her. And she's rehearsed the speech a number of times. One can tell by the way she's stopped herself from swearing. This is the part where she kind of goes off script, though. Which becomes obvious from the passion that starts to seep into her voice.]

Everyone is always telling me that I need to keep it a secret, you know? I need to shut the fuck up and keep my head down and stay out of trouble. I've followed the fucking rules, toed the damn company line or whatever. And it's complete bullshit. I mean, forgetting the fact that people have a fucking right to know that there are vampires out there...come on! We're in a magical kidnapping city. With demons walking around! I dare any of you to tell me this is the weirdest thing you've heard in the last month.

[Whoa. Okay, time to slow down. Sam pauses, taking a deep breath, getting a hold of herself.]

Fuck. Look. I just. There's no point to being secretive about it. And if you don't want anything to do with me or whatever, your choice.

Also, if there are any vampires listening to this, you're welcome to keep yourself secret or whatever. If you're actually able to do it, mazel tov, you're better than I am or whatever. But don't even think about trying to take me out for doing this. It's not going to make a damn difference.

[A small pause.]

Oh. Right. My name is Sam. And...that's all, I guess.

[She reaches over and shuts off the feed.]

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[That earns him the most withering of all looks. Fear and uncertainty about vampires? Yeah. Sure. That’s to be expected. But she is so not up for fake geek girl bullshit.]

Yeah. Believe it or not, chicks like Space Wars too.

[he waves her off immediately]

That's not how I meant that. [he's known his share of women in the business] More -- you reminded me of someone. [who was a dude]

...someone you wanted to stab through the heart with a wooden stake?

[She's just trying to figure out where she stands, right now.]

I'm not sure anyone I know falls into that category.

[Aiden. he wouldn't mind putting a stake through Aiden's heart. maybe that little bitch that stabbed Akechi, once upon a time]

[but anyway] Your not-so-secret secret is safe with me.

[a beat]

I do have so many questions, now, though.

Well. I can answer some.

[She shrugs.]

It's probably gonna be a disappointment though. Spoiler alert: Stephanie Meyer was full of crap.

I'm going to guess it's more spontaneously combust than sparkle, then?

Lots and lots and lots of fire.

[She pauses.]

Although it's not a universal truth. Some vampires can learn to deal with sunlight. Including me, in case you're ever pissed at me. Sunlight doesn't work so much.

Did you spend years building up a tolerance to Iocane powder?

[minus the reference, he'd guess that's how it'd have to work. exposing yourself a little at a time until you didn't have such a bad reaction]

Inconceivable.

[But the reference gets a smile out of her. Sam's smile is crooked. Like she's out-of-practice doing it.]

[Damien grins equally crookedly, though in his case, it's not because he's out of practice -- it's just how his face is. there's something crooked to him, period]

[either way, though, the expression fades sooner rather than later] So, how about running water, holy ground, garlic -- that kind of thing.

[Sam shakes her head. She's not about to tell him how to kill her. But there doesn't seem to be much point in not dispelling some myths.]

Not really. I mean, I've heard stories about vampires having garlic issues, but never actually seen it or experienced it.

[to his credit, he's not actually trying to figure out how best to kill her. he's just genuinely albeit ravenously curious]

Good to know we can still do Italian.

[a beat]

Can you still eat?

Um. No.

[Which you never think is going to suck as much as it does. Until you wake up one night, craving Mom's matzo ball soup and realize that you will never have it again.]

Diet's pretty limited to liquid. One particular liquid.

[he makes a face on her behalf -- he knows intimately what it's like it not be able to eat. the Void really didn't have any concept of hunger or food for a very long time]

Well, that's definitely not Stephanie Meyer approved.

[maybe. he can't say he's actually read the Twilight books. his taste in fiction was always a little more high brow than that. a lot more high brow]

[anyway. next question]

Should I ask how old you actually are?

Isn't there some shit about not asking a lady that question?

[And she gives a very lady-like snort.]

Not that it fucking applies here.

[A small shrug.]

I'm twenty.

[Yeah, she died rather recently.]

Well, if it makes you feel any better, you're literally less than half my age.

[fuck, he feels old now, thanks]

At least you'll be young and beautiful forever?

[he wishes he were twenty again]

Beautiful?

[She starts laughing. And then she can't stop. It's a wild, sort of crazed laughter that manages to shake her whole body.]

[frowning as suddenly as she started laughing, he shrugs]

At the risk of coming off like a creepy old man.

[sure, why not?]

Oh, I've met creepier and I've met older.

[She shakes her head, although a few giggles continue to escape.]

Definite points of deranged, though.

[VIDEO]; UN: Sleepwalker

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